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I married you for life, not for lunch



 
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admin
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Joined: 20 Sep 2006
Posts: 65

PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2006 10:28 pm    Post subject: I married you for life, not for lunch Reply with quote

Administrator's Note: See the Featured Article in the "Tips and Picks" section of Topretirements.com.

We would like to hear your experience on this issue - feel free to comment on it here! Just click on Post Reply (you will need to get a login, which the system will prompt you for)
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readytoplay



Joined: 13 Nov 2006
Posts: 24

PostPosted: Tue Nov 21, 2006 9:17 pm    Post subject: oh boy Reply with quote

From our experience this whole issue takes some adjustments. One that i had to learn the hard way is that as the newly retired person I needed to realize that my dear wife had already been working from home for years. Therefore I was the intruder. But after a few weeks we worked out a routine. I try not to get irritated when the phone ringsg - because it is often for me. And as an added benefit, some times she does make my lunch!
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ctyankee



Joined: 27 Nov 2006
Posts: 23

PostPosted: Sun Dec 03, 2006 3:45 pm    Post subject: Lunch break Reply with quote

When this happened to us we had a rough period for a while. i went around turning off lights and commenting about all of the yoga, pilates, and massages that ate up the time that the dear wife said she didnt have. Then i woke up and said to myself, this might be a good idea. Gives me some peace and her some space from a grumpy old ct yankee!

Now we get along fine, enjoy more time together than we had before.
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Boomer1



Joined: 24 Nov 2006
Posts: 51
Location: Madison CT

PostPosted: Tue Dec 12, 2006 10:39 pm    Post subject: Married you for life Reply with quote

My advice to the newly retired when the partner already lives/works at home all day - get an outside office! It won't cost you much. You'll get some space. You'll get discipline by going there everyday. And when you have to pay the rent it will give you motivation to make enough to cover it!
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readytoplay



Joined: 13 Nov 2006
Posts: 24

PostPosted: Wed Dec 20, 2006 12:49 am    Post subject: Married you for life, as long as we're apart Reply with quote

I can't help but wonder how many people delay retirement because the thought of being home all day with their spouse scares the daylights out of them.
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admin
Site Admin


Joined: 20 Sep 2006
Posts: 65

PostPosted: Mon Jul 30, 2007 6:45 pm    Post subject: post missing Reply with quote

Sorry, but we noticed that this thread has been unavailable for awhile, or at least hard to find. It is now available again.
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luvneverends



Joined: 25 Oct 2007
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 7:03 am    Post subject: Go out for a nice oversea travel Reply with quote

Aha, finally free. We have enough time to enjoy life. How about a nice oversea travel?

Sometimes, I hope I become a lion, but I'm just a cat!

http://www.seniorwoo.com/blog?thatsme
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2putz



Joined: 20 Dec 2007
Posts: 29

PostPosted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 1:00 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Having 2 people home all day does take some adjusting. I suggest having a discussion about expectations. If you hate being interrupted, set "office hours" or an invisible wall. If you are, like in my case, wake up and realize that there is a lot of "work" being done at home that you never took part in. So pitch in and help unload the groceries or do the shopping. In exchange, set some boundaries. It's working for us, but it did take some to-ing and fro-ing.
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Pammy



Joined: 30 Jul 2008
Posts: 5

PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2008 6:26 pm    Post subject: Separate Togetherness! Reply with quote

Rolling Eyes
It was tough at first. I like to write and hubby likes golf.
We both love to travel, as well as loving music and shows...so we make the time to do these things together.

It's been eight years now and we still manage to get along...LOL

The thing is to respect one another's space and daytime activity planning.
Keep it loose and lively...just the way it was when you first got married!
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Richard



Joined: 19 Aug 2008
Posts: 5

PostPosted: Tue Aug 19, 2008 10:50 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

It's always a big change if one person in the household retires but after being married for so many years it should be possible to work out a way to enjoy the new situation.
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marty50



Joined: 13 Dec 2006
Posts: 25

PostPosted: Sun Oct 05, 2008 12:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Funny to see this post. Just today I heard 2 different people say that line: "i married you for life, not for lunch.". Obviously it strikes a nerve. My opinion is that handling this all depends. I know some couples where the odds are pretty good that 2 people at home aren't going to work - one needs a hobby or a job! But I seen 2 retireds work out well at home - provided they have something interesting or meaningful to do.
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