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Husband’s Ego Nose Dives After Retirement

Category: Health and Wellness Issues

September 21, 2019 — Our friend and long-time Member Ed Lafreniere was kind enough to send us some of the articles he has written for his new website, RetirementHumor.net. They take the form of a funny, but pertinent question, and an equally amusing but useful answer. We chose this particularly useful one as a great follow-up to our recent article on “How Different Retirement is from Every Other Lifestage”. Meanwhile, you might enjoy Ed’s lighthearted approach to retirement over at his site! Thanks Ed.

Dear Sage:

My husband retired six months ago and is experiencing a huge void in his social life now that he’s no longer working. He misses the lunches, the camaraderie, and, I believe, the respect and status. Over 45 years of work in the auto industry, his ego grew like a balloon – not a massive Macy’s parade-sized balloon, but one that was of reasonable and respectable size. Now it’s been punctured and he’s feeling deflated. We have moved to Florida and he has a lot of time to reflect, since all the distracting tasks involved in a 1,400-mile move have ended. He’s getting more than a little down, as if he’s been abruptly cut off from his known world, and his disappointment is driving me nuts, though I try my best to be understanding and supportive. He calls former co-workers, or emails them, but they often don’t respond. And when they do, the replies seem politely perfunctory, and hubby senses (correctly, I think) that he’s being patronized more than a little bit – they’ll treat the old codger with due dignity given his long tenure, but that’s about it. Short of my sticking a bicycle pump in his ear and blowing his ego back up, how can we get him out of this funk?

                                                                             Frustrated in Florida

Dear Frustrated:

   First of all, The Sage would not recommend a bicycle pump, as you can readily purchase an air pump made for the express purpose of blowing up balloons. But you don’t really want to risk an invasion of your home by OSHA inspectors arriving with sirens blaring after you misuse portable power equipment, do you?

   Your husband’s issue is far from unique. Post-career adjustment difficulties are common, especially for those who have not planned for change in their social lives and who instead have assumed that as soon as they leave their retirement party, they will put that chapter behind them and proceed head-first into retirement as if cliff-diving in Acapulco. Problem is, many people don’t know how to swim in these new waters, let alone land safely.

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Posted by Admin on September 20th, 2019

Retirement: So Radically Different from Other Life Experiences

Category: Retirement Planning

September 17, 2019 — A special Retirement supplement in the New York Times was filled with sage advice about baby boomer retirements. The Sept. 12 section had articles on topics like finances, the new retirement, finding purpose, etc. ( See link at end, you might also find it in your library). The experts and retired people interviewed there (some quoted below) sparked a whole raft of new thoughts about retirement. Particularly, it made us realize how retirement is such a different experience from any other phase of life. Retirement might even be harder, mainly because it requires a great deal of self-initiative to do it right. Here are some of our new thoughts on the retirement process.

No ritual. The founder of consulting company Age Wave, Ken Dychtwald, points out that there is a ritual associated with most of the events in our lives, but not retirement. When you started school your mother probably took you out to buy clothes, and the whole family waited for the bus to pick you up. The process of going to college meant you took tests, visited campuses, got counseling, and if lucky, had parents who gave plenty of advice. Graduations were fraught with ceremony. But on the day you retire, you might be lucky to go out for drinks with colleagues. The next day all the trappings and structure of 40 years of working disappear.

“In retirement you are in a class of one; it’s a life test with no text and no teacher”

Topretirements.com
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Posted by Admin on September 16th, 2019

Original Medicare + Medigap vs. Medicare Advantage – Which is Right for You?

Category: Health and Wellness Issues

September 8, 2019 — As promised, our series on Medicare continues with an analysis of the competing forms of Medicare: Original Medicare + Medigap insurance vs. Medicare Advantage (Part C). This seems like a particularly good time for it, since the Medicare Open Enrollment Period begins on Oct. 15. We are grateful to Tom Cretella, CLU, an insurance broker with almost 50 years of experience and know-how in this field, for answering these frequently-asked questions. You can find the other articles in this series listed at the end. As always, we welcome your comments and questions on this complex and important topic.

Q. What is the significance of the Open Enrollment Period (AEP) which begins Oct. 15 and runs through Dec. 7?

A. The Annual Open Enrollment Period happens each year from Oct 15- Dec 7. During this time people can change coverages without fear of pre-existing conditions not being covered. If they have a Medigap plan and original Medicare they can change plans or elect a Medicare Advantage plan. This enables a Medicare beneficiary to buy a plan that suits their utilization habits and pocketbook. All changes become effective on January 1. On Sept 30 each plan is required to send a Notice of Change to Medicare Beneficiaries outlining any changes for the following year. More Blog articles like this…

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Posted by Admin on September 7th, 2019

Retire Close to Family… Or Not Too Close!

Category: Family and Retirement

September 4, 2019 — A constant question that comes up about retirement, and one that produces hundreds of comments, is “Is it a good idea to retire near my family”? Whether family means parents, children, grandchildren, or siblings – the question has many complex and potentially conflicting elements. In this article we will go over some of the pros and cons, as well as a short checklist to help you determine if retiring near family should be in your future. We also look forward to your comments on this topic about your preferences and experiences.

A happy family getogether

Pros of Retiring Near Family
– Ability to help new parents as they juggle careers and child-rearing
– The chance to see your family members often
– Be part of the lives of your grandchildren as they grow up
– Support for your parents or siblings as they age or need help
– Support for adult children who need it
– Support and companionship for you as you age
– Built in social network MORE Blog articles like this

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Posted by Admin on September 3rd, 2019

Medicare Open Enrollment Period is Coming. Prepare Now to Choose Best Plan for You

Category: Health and Wellness Issues

September 3, 2019 — Lately we have had a mini-avalanche of comments and questions about Medicare. They are mostly to do with which is the best plan to choose – Regular Medicare, or one of the many choices under Medicare Advantage? With plans ranging from A – N, it can all be downright confusing. So, to help you prepare for the upcoming Medicare Open Enrollment period (starts October 15 and runs through December 7), we are fortunate to have a Q and A article with a real Medicare insurance expert (now available). Tom Cretella of Cretella and Belowsky will try to answer many of the questions we have seen come up on this issue. Stay tuned, it should be very helpful! (Also, see list of related articles in our Medicare series at end)

New Medicare Comparison Plan Tool Announced by Medicare.gov.

More Blog articles like this…

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Posted by Admin on September 2nd, 2019

The Seven Deadly Sins of Retirement

Category: Retirement Planning

August 27, 2019 — Seven seems to be the magic number when it comes to sacraments, dwarfs, and deadly sins. In this article we will pose our seven retirement sins – the worst mistakes you can make in retirement – the kind of error that can ruin even the most carefully thought out retirement. We hope you will add your own ideas for sins – based on your own experience.

Retire too early. Sure, many people have it in their head to retire as soon as they can. For many it is a good move, for others it is a disaster. By working longer you can save more money, have to finance fewer years with your savings, and increase your Social Security benefits. Even if you do have enough money to retire you might still not be happy. Which leads us to the next point. SEE MORE BLOG POSTS

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Posted by Admin on August 26th, 2019

Is 10,000 Steps a Day the Right Number?

Category: Health and Wellness Issues

August 21, 2019 – New research from Brigham and Women’s Hospital in Boston suggests that the magical goal of 10,000 steps a day might not be the right number. The research, conducted among women aged 62 to 101, found that the quartile that averaged 4,400 steps a day had a 41% increase in longevity compared to the lowest quartile, which averaged only 2,700 steps. There were modest longevity gains in the third quartile (average of 7,500 steps), but no noticeable improvement in the 4th quartile (more than 7,500).

Courtesy of Ricardo Esquivel 

The magic number of 10,000 steps appears to have little if any scientific basis. It appears to have been started by a Japanese company that manufactured a pedometer, whose Japanese name meant 10,000 steps meter in English. One thing that 10,000 steps would do for you is to get you closer to an average of 30 minutes of exercise per day, although it is not clear that would result in an improvement over a more modest amount.

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Posted by Admin on August 21st, 2019

Bizarre Lists for Best and Worst States for Retirement: Who Are These Companies?

Category: Best Retirement Towns and States

August 21, 2019 — There seems to be a never ending supply of articles touting the best and worst states to retire in. People obviously enjoy reading them. The trouble is that many of the websites publishing them have no expertise in retirement, and a result the lists they come up often have no connection to where people actually want to retire.

A good example is the recent list from Bankrate.com, which must have been overjoyed to see their picks reprinted in the New York Times and many other big media outlets. For the record, Bankrate.com is a website that promotes credit cards and loans, very similar to what wallethub.com does (but which generally produces more credible lists). Other frequent list generators are GOBankingRates.com and Smartasset.com, the latter of which is a site promoting financial advisors. Search on Google for “best places to retire” and sites like these will have prominent rankings, because it is good for their financial businesses. See the top listing in this screen capture, Homesnacks.net – anyone see their connection to retirement? (see more list companies at end)

Here is the list of Best States to retire from Bankrate.com:

  • Nebraska
  • Iowa
  • Missouri
  • South Dakota
  • Florida
  • Kentucky
  • Kansas
  • North Carolina
  • Montana
  • Hawaii
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Posted by Admin on August 20th, 2019

Claiming Social Security: The Most Popular Questions

Category: Financial and taxes in retirement

August 14, 2019 — Some of the questions about Social Security that come up most frequently concern claiming benefits. People are confused or unsure about when they can claim, how much they will receive, spousal benefits (including those for divorced people), special filing strategies, etc. This article will go over some of those questions and, hopefully, provide helpful answers.

When can I claim Social Security retirement benefits? Most people have a pretty good idea of the answer to this question – the earliest you can claim is age 62. The longer you wait to claim, the higher your benefit, up until age 70.

What is my “Full Retirement Age” (FRA)? This is the age when you fully qualify for your Social Security benefits. For people born between 1943 and 1954 the FRA is age 66. For those born in 1955 or after, it increases two month per year until it reaches age 67 for those born in 1960 or later. Note that “Full” is not a totally logical term, since if you delay collecting your benefits past your FRA you will get higher than “full” benefits anytime up to age 70.

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Posted by Admin on August 13th, 2019

Move or Stay in Retirement? Big Questions to Answer

Category: Retirement Planning

August 6, 2019 — Perhaps the most fundamental question you face in retirement is to move or not. You might be considering retiring from the midwest, for example, to the Sunbelt. Or from the suburbs to a city or active adult community. You decision might not mean moving far; perhaps just relocating to a more age-appropriate home in the area where you live now. Whatever you decide, we think that if you are going to do a good job of retiring, you need to answer the question.

As for where to retire, that is mostly what this site is about. We’ve written all kinds of articles about the possibilities, with reviews of thousands of towns and communities to explore. So in this one we are going to try to answer some of the questions that might come up as you think about whether you should move or not. (Thanks to Jeanette Pavini of TheStreet.com for posing these questions we answered in an article at TheStreet.com)


Q: How should someone determine if they should stay in their current home/location to retire, or if they should consider moving?
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A:  As we said up top, this is a hugely important question for retirees. The type of home you live in and where it is located can have a profound impact on your retirement lifestyle. Most people are comfortable living where they have always lived, so it is a big deal to consider moving. There is hassle, expense, and the fear and uncertainty of moving to the unknown. Your social life will be majorly affected.

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Posted by Admin on August 5th, 2019