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Is Your Covid Compliance and Vigilance Changing Over Time?

Category: Health and Wellness Issues

June 24, 2020 – One thing we can all agree on, Covid is getting old, even if it isn’t going away. Most people have been very good about trying to stay safe, keeping their social distance, wearing masks in public, and avoiding high risk behaviors like large indoor social gatherings. Not so long ago in cities and towns, people often switched sides of the street to avoid contaminating one another. But as time goes on it seems like many are getting relaxed about it. Maybe too relaxed, in view of the fact that this crisis could be with us a long time. With 10 states recording case increases of 50% in the past few days, there is the danger that could overwhelm our healthcare system.

We would like to get Member input on how your response to the pandemic is changing over time. For example, are you doing things now that you wouldn’t have considered a few months ago? If so, what kinds of activities (eating out, travel, visiting friends, sports, a haircut, etc.) are you engaging in that you now consider safe or minimal risk? Are you as careful about wiping things down as you were before? Do you have a bubble, and how do you make sure you stay safe within it? Do you socialize with others outside your bubble, and if so, under what circumstances?

Please use the Comments section below to share how your compliance attitudes and behaviors have changed over time, and what you consider safe. We aren’t looking to debate how real the crisis is, or shame those who are clearly not concerned about the pandemic. There are those in that camp, but there is not much we can do, except give them a wide berth. In the meantime, we hope you will all stay vigilant and safe. Until we have a vaccine, our generation is the most vulnerable.

Posted by Admin on June 23rd, 2020

63 Comments »

  1. My life has changed drastically since the start of this pandemic. I had a new retirement job that I loved working in a school, which has close. I won’t be going back because I am at very high risk. I have been battling cancer and all of my appointments were postponed until this week because the hospital was inundated with covid. I have been isolated since the beginning of March. I get groceries delivered, take rides in the car, and take walks. My life has been turned upside down. For those of us who live alone, stay at home orders have meant complete isolation. This won’t change. I don’t know when I will resume life again or if I iwll ever have a normal life again.

    by Maimi — June 24, 2020

  2. I almost might be doing more. Go to work – in a private office, see maybe 2 people a week for no more than 5 minutes at a time. Stay home and take walks. Limit my trip to the grocery store to once every 3 weeks and then go armed with a list – in and out of the store in 30 minutes. Those grocery runs are first thing in the morning as soon as the store opens. Have been to the hardware store a few times since this all started. Same thing there – in and out fast. Wear a mask when going into a store. hands are probably cleaner than ever with the constant washing – sing to myself while washing to make sure I get a longer than normal time. One good thing – I have discovered the library’s ebook system and read constantly. Don’t like to watch the news, as everything on it is really depressing now.

    by nancy — June 24, 2020

  3. I’ve been isolating since February. Nothing will change for us until they come up with a vaccine. I’m in the higher risk area so we just stay in our condo in coastal Sandiego except to take a walk with mask and goggles on. We sometimes take a ride in the car to keep it working. We take extra herbs and vitamins to build up our immunity. Have had no contact with anyone except my husband. We are lucky to have everything delivered to the home including meds. We watch alot of Britbox as of late and love their comedies. You need to laugh while we’re going through these Covid times. Getting back to some crafting projects and taking care of our 3 cats. Life for us hasn’t changed that much but it would be nice to be able to go to a restaurant or some shopping. I’m beginning to think that everyone over 60 will have to continue wearing masks even if it’s just to feel safer. It’s not that big of a deal and wish everyone would do the same….

    by Mary11 — June 24, 2020

  4. Since the virus hit, I have been more active and out than I was prior. Where I used to go to the gym daily for 1 hour, now I spend 6 hours volunteering at the Regional Food Bank, since they lost all their older volunteers due to being age based risked. NYS passed an executive order to restrict their participation, so not being 70, and having volunteered weekly in the past, it just seemed like the thing to do. Other than my full time volunteering, nothing really changed, I shop as needed and try to retain a normal exsistance. My feeling is that the media has blown this totally out of proportion. Do not get me wrong, it is a serious illness but not the humanity killer it is purported to be. I admit, I am in excellent health and stay fit and many folks have underlying issues, but for the most part it is survivable. I hope everyone finds their sweet spot to re-enter the world. For now I am continuing to do what I can to help others and family as best I can. I did have to postpone 2 scuba trips because the locations were closed but they will reopen and then I can resume those activities too.

    by Bruceb1013 — June 24, 2020

  5. I could literally parrot the words posted above. My wife and I are both high risk with little chance of survival if we contract the virus. We have each other and our email/phone contact with family/friends. We do only brief necessary trips or receive deliveries always wearing masks, carrying sanitizer, and even changing clothes if we had to go inside where there are many people (like grocery stores). We stay constantly busy with our interests using Zoom if appropriate. We have each other and are always grateful for that (not to say that it doesn’t get stormy at times :<). Being mostly loners and living in the woods, our lives haven't changed much, but some boredom is certainly developing and we would dearly love to personally visit. But that isn't going to happen until there is a proven effective vaccine. As stated above, that may well be a long way off if ever. Consider that at times the seasonal flu vaccine has an effectiveness rate of less than 40% or a max of 70%. Transfer that to Covid and what are the chances? My mil is 97, still going, isolated except for local family, yet a trip for a personal visit is not yet in our plan.

    by RichPB — June 24, 2020

  6. Have been isolating since February. I try to exercise common sense. In my local community in South Florida I can safely take my dog for a walk around the neighborhood without having to wear a mask. I do carry it with me in case I have to pass by someone. I keep a mask in my car. I always wear a mask in supermarket and try to distance. The only time I use gloves is when I pump gas at my local station. I’m retired and old so am used to a more quiet lifestyle. I am very careful around other people as I care about everyone. Recently my cousin whom I haven’t seen since Xmas past, invited me to her cottage which she is renovating. We both wore masks, and we sat 10 feet apart and had a wonderful conversation. But sadly no hugging. I miss going the beach and my parks. I think since this is going to be with us for a long time; I’m just going to go very early like 6:00am for beach and 8:00am when parks open.

    by Claire Sherman — June 24, 2020

  7. I have not seen my grandchildren(except by Face Time) since the middle of March. They are 10 months and 2 years old. They live in the same town. My 10 year old granddaughter lives out of town and will not be visiting this summer. My goal is to see the two little ones in July if we all stay well. This would make a good Retirement Blog story about how grandparents are dealing with being separated from grandchildren. Other than that, I am still working part time as a public health nurse doing case investigation and contact tracing for Covid. After work, it’s back to my little bubble with my husband and adult daughter. Once/week grocery trips, no eating out, etc.

    by Sharon — June 24, 2020

  8. We are pretty much homebodies anyway and have no children so not much has changed for us except for the fact that I miss grocery shopping in the leisurely fashion we used to. I enjoy seeing new products and finding bargains. We have been having groceries delivered for the most part. I have done curb side pick up and have shopped twice at a store that is close to home and is more expensive than the store I prefer to shop at. I was gifted a new Roku stick and found a bargain offer with Starz for $25 for 6 months. Then it reverts to a more normal price after 6 months but still very affordable. We are currently enjoying a 5 season series that has kept us entertained. I have a few other shows on the agenda after the current show ends. I have been buying lots of foods and supplies on line and our inventory is very good. The virus is expected to get worse so I am stockpiling certain things so we don’t have to worry. For instance, it is just the two of us but I bought three 5 lb. bags of rice. I am breaking each down to more manageable 1 lb. bags, inserting bay leaves (to kill off any possible bugs) and vacuum packing each, then stacking them flat. It doesn’t hurt to have some supplies on hand to make life easier down the road. Have been buying some canned things like tuna, salmon, chicken. I have 2 dogs so I make sure to have their canned food supplied too. The virus may come back and hopefully we all can buy a few extra supplies to have on hand instead of going to the stores in a few months to find the shelves empty. I am not a hoarder or a prepper but we can learn from preppers in getting some basics to get us thru tough times. The other thing is that if you end up with too much stuff, you can always donate it to a food bank down the road. I have even donated dog food. I have two elderly dogs who have required specialty Vet prescribed dog foods. Sometimes the Vets suggest something else and I end up with cans the dogs are no longer eating and I have donated it to the local animal shelter. They are very appreciative because they have dogs with illnesses too. I was watching a video on youtube and this person was kind of new to prepping and was suggesting things to have on hand. His big thing was you don’t have to go out and spend thousands of dollars all at once to attain an inventory, but each time you shop, pick up a few items. Such as canned beans, canned meats, rice and other things that are shelf stable.

    People want to go back to normal and ditch the masks and mingle. If we all just chill out and follow some good advice from Dr. Fauci and other experts, we can hopefully stay safe.

    Maybe some of you who have elderly neighbors can make a goody basket to bring to their homes with shelf stable food items. As they say, we are all in this together and the virus does not discriminate on age, wealth, location.

    Keep safe!

    by Louise — June 25, 2020

  9. Coping with Covid: daughter is extrovert, works from her home, but is Zoomed-out and wants to be among people again. Son-in-law is introvert whose job requires constant public contact, much to his dismay, but is relieved to be back to work. They are part of our “bubble” so delighted to see the grandchild frequently. Spouse can golf again! So all is right in the world there. I’ve always been more of a hermit and enjoy the seclusion of grooving in my little oasis. (Of course it’s summer, might be more like The Shining when winter rolls around.) Bummed that our area has rediscovered nature making the local park the new hangout, so crowded. Hopefully some will run back to their air-conditioned huts now that the heat is on. Handling groceries and seeing favorite restaurants and stores declaring bankruptcy or teetering on the brink is sad and scary. On the other hand, very lucky to have all loved ones in good health so far.

    by Daryl — June 25, 2020

  10. Due to the much publicized rise in cases, NC will now begin requiring wearing masks outside the home. The governor has been good with virus management attempts, but has received a lot of push back and non-compliance which has led to the current situation. We will have to see how it goes, but it’s a relief to be part of the mandated norm instead of the exception. (In my few trips out, I have more recently seen more masks — especially with older folks.)

    by RichPB — June 25, 2020

  11. How has my response to the pandemic changed over time? I live in an area where cases are rising, and I continue to mask, wash hands, shelter at home, social distance, and stay informed about what is happening locally. A huge change is that I am not terrified like I was at first. This is the new normal, until an effective vaccine is available to me, and I accept it. I’m ultra careful around other humans and in public, but I find ways to release stress so that I won’t live in fear. I do not binge buy food and other items like I did a few months ago. I still have back-ups, but not in the same quantity. Pet food, yes, as the meat industry is jeopardized, which also means pet food may be in the future; I am stocked up and replace what is used. Yesterday I went to my local farmer to buy peaches, a cabbage, 2 Bermuda onions, and a lovely tomato. They wore masks, I wore a mask, all used hand coverings, and we all stayed far apart from each other. But we had a warm conversation, happy to see each other since last summer, chatting about produce and living in a pandemic. Being in a small town allows me to build strong acquaintanceships with local merchants, small business owners, clerks, and handy-folks with whom I’ve interacted over the past 2.5 years. As time has passed in the pandemic, we now talk about other topics and not only the pandemic, so that is different. Although I live alone, locals help me to feel connected to my community, as I must continue to have house maintenance done, go to the post office, buy groceries, see the doc and the vet, interact with neighbors, occasionally go to the bank, and so on. Only people with masks are allowed in my house, and they are few and far between. I never mowed a lawn before, but I bought an electric mower and will start mowing. I’m rearranging my furniture throughout the house, supposedly a favorite activity of Millennials, and only started this recently because I began to feel hopeful again. I’m gardening more in my lovely, large backyard, than at the pandemic’s beginning because I am no longer afraid to be outside in my own yard. During May and June, I learned new technologies to do more online activities. I continue to write cards and letters, even to online friends, read a lot and stream videos online. I don’t travel, drive little, and am not expanding my retired life in ways I thought I would (gym, face-to-face classes, onsite museums and concerts, etc). I am re-evaluating my future retirement goals, as I see the need to change them to be aligned with the new normal. It’s disappointing in some ways, but mostly, it’s interesting.

    by Elaine C. — June 25, 2020

  12. For many of us, travel was the thing we would finally be able to do once we retired. I have a list. A trip to Africa was scheduled for early June. Well, we see how that didn’t happen. I live in Florida, so they aren’t going to let us travel the world anytime soon. My take away from all this: don’t put off to tomorrow what you could do today. I have definitely read a LOT more books, if nothing else.

    by Lynn — June 25, 2020

  13. Great point, Lynn, when will we ever learn that life is not infinite? This was the summer we were going to start traveling, and I could kick myself for waiting. BUT, great incentive to stay healthy and get in better shape, then how much more we will savor each experience when it’s safe to go again!

    by Daryl — June 25, 2020

  14. My stepson is getting married the end of August in Utah. They are still having a small reception at a relatives home. I have asthma and am not really looking forward to flying( I live in Washington) or hanging around people that dont wear masks. I’m not sure what to do at this point. Just dreading it when I should be happy

    by Tomi — June 25, 2020

  15. Well, I’m kind of thinking that this isolation thing would be my life at 80 something not 60 something. Although we’re very compliant, I resent what I can’t have. Mostly family and friends, dining out once in awhile, and a few weekend trips. I feel our time to enjoy life is being taken from us through no fault of our own.

    by Staci — June 25, 2020

  16. Tomi, This news item might put you a little at ease for the trip to your stepson’s wedding. Study suggests asthma is NOT a risk factor for serious complications of the virus.
    https://www.usnews.com/news/health-news/articles/2020-06-19/asthma-isnt-a-risk-factor-for-worsening-covid-19-study

    by Jean — June 26, 2020

  17. From all the comments I’m reading I am glad that I did all of my world wide travels when I was younger. All family members are deceased and I have no children. So happy with talking more with friends and spending time with my husband and 3 cats. Our life hasn’t changed that much since Covid. So it makes it easier making some adjustments but not that critical. We just need to move to a more permanent home and we’re leery about moving and being able to stay safe through the moving process….

    by Mary11 — June 26, 2020

  18. I just retired in January from working for an airline for 20 years. My goal was to spend my retirement traveling then covid-19 hit. I made 2 trips and put the brakes on the travel. Hopefully there will be a vaccine early next year so I can start my travels again. Since I haven’t traveled been doing a lot of walking and reading but still can’t wait to get back in the skies!

    by beebs54 — June 26, 2020

  19. Thank Jean for the info. Still dont want to fly. So guess what?! We just bought a nice, new travel trailer. Ready to hit the road now!

    by Tomi — June 27, 2020

  20. Tomi, Happy road trip 🙂 I stopped flying after 9-11 and since retiring we drive everywhere, have learned to enjoy the open roads.

    by Jean — June 28, 2020

  21. I think a little perspective would be helpful here. Covid-19 is deadly, especially for those of us who are the target audience of TopRetirements. And despite cable news hysterics about the effects of isolation on the human spirit, we don’t know what the long term effects will be. Children do need to be with other children, but while they are not, their parents — many of them home with the kids for much of these last five months — can be creative and helpful in reducing the effects. And for those of us who need to focus on the perils of social distancing and the depressive aspects of isolation, perhaps we should pick a book from the shelf or order from Amazon the “Diary of Anne Frank” or the story of those miners trapped for months underground or the Donner Party or some book about true isolation. Because being stuck at home with Netflix and Alexa, and delivery from Instacart and Amazon, and free Zoom for meetings with family and friends (for 40 minutes at a time) just doesn’t seem so bad. Does it?

    by Larry — June 28, 2020

  22. I watch the 3 main cable news stations Friday night and see and hear that our world is coming to an end. I go out Saturday morning to do my 1 hour of cardio. I live in North Los Angeles county in a arid region. The sun is bright and the sky is pure blue and the temperature is pushing 100. Vehicles are towing trailers and boats. Motorcycles are flying down the road at high speeds. People are walking, jogging, and riding bicycles. Moms are pushing their young children in strollers. The noise level is high. People are alive and living life. I come to the conclusion that in all probability the world will not come to an end today!

    by Bubbajug — June 28, 2020

  23. In the last two weeks, I have ventured out to play golf three times and plan and doing so again next week. I live in CT and the golf courses here have seemed to comply with all regulations. However, i have not been impressed with some of the golfers I have watched. No masks on the tee boxes and some talking to each other at three feet away. My golf course last week had rigged up a contraption so that you could, with your golf club, lift up a hook on the flagstick and pop your ball out of the cup. On the first hole, the golfer we were paired with failed on his first attempt to pop the ball out of the cup and just reached down with his hand on the hook and popped it up. Not cool.

    by Larry Gavrich — June 28, 2020

  24. Actually, Bubbajog, your optimism has rubbed off on me, and I thank you for that. I, too, have started appreciating more the little things like birdsong and my grandson’s giggle, and am navigating life with less of a sense of doom than when this all began. Maybe life became too predictable and this challenged our coping skills. They say what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.

    by Daryl — June 28, 2020

  25. We moved Maimi’s comment here from a different Blog:

    Bubba, not to burst your bubble, but California and several other states are now seeing big surges and facing another shutdown. The past few days have seen the highest numbers yet! Wishing won’t make this go away, and the world has come to an end for several people I know.

    By Maimi

    by Jane at Topretirements — June 28, 2020

  26. Many Americans are not good at delaying gratification. There seems to be a prevailing thought that, well, I’ve done my isolation, now it’s both the time and my right to get back to normal, to do the things I WANT to do. We can’t understand or accept that we unfortunately happen to be living at a time when a major, deadly pandemic is significantly and negatively affecting our country and the world. This is what the fates have handed us, and nature/scientific fact must take its course. No matter how we react, that’s what WILL happen. However, we can both mitigate and possibly lessen the length of the pandemic by following what the scientific community says must be the rules and guidelines. “Reopening” needs to be be accomplished on a slow timeline. Rushing back to the way it was before is very likely to bring us a world of hurt, and extend the pandemic. As I think I’ve said before, we can’t fool Mother Nature. By the same token, we must try to maintain hope and good spirits. It’s difficult, but I believe and pray we can do it. However, let’s be careful we don’t get ahead of ourselves in an attempt to obtain overly-quick gratification, although that is our human nature.

    by Clyde — June 28, 2020

  27. Maimi, no worries. My bubble won.t burst. When we are no longer part of the solution, we then become part of the problem! All we have to do is look at the population of California, Texas, and Florida. The 3 most populous states in the country. California by itself is a nation state, with the 5th largest GDP in the world. These 3 states are a large chunk of the U.S. population. Yes, there will be challenges and setbacks. That is to be expected. California has now made it mandatory that masks be worn in all public areas. San Francisco has put a hold on any new openings. Like all challenges in life, you evaluate the situation and and try to construct the best solution.

    by Bubbajog — June 28, 2020

  28. One of the hardest thing for us (and I assume many others) is not being able to see our grandchildren and family members. Our grandkids are on the other coast with a mother who is an ER doctor who frequently helps COVID patients – there is no safe way we can visit them, or vice versa. Talking and reading stories on Facetime is pretty good, but not the same as hugging our toddlers in person. Does anyone have suggestions on how to improve that distancing challenge? Also, getting together in person with nearby relatives and friends is a challenge. We want to see them, and think having another couple over where we can sit outside with different snack bowls and drinks is pretty safe. But I worry over time we will be tempted to stretch that, and don’t want to be a part of spreading the virus.

    by Josh — July 4, 2020

  29. Josh, I agree on all counts. Something to think about for even masked, safe distance visits is bathroom facilities. That’s a real challenge for most and prevents us visiting daughter’s family even though they are only a short distance away. We happen to ha a totally separate bath and HEPA filter on HVAC, but they are concerned about potential for bringing contamination to us — correctly as it happened though all is ok now. Perhaps some could get a camper potty for outdoor use. Be sure to consider wind direction — 6 feet can change to 20 feet or more for safety even in a slight breeze.

    by RichPB — July 5, 2020

  30. Watched this on PBS last evening. Enough to make me not drop my guard too much.
    https://www.pbs.org/video/inside-italys-covid-war-kjangp/

    by Peder — July 5, 2020

  31. I spent Independence Day at my sister’s and her boyfriend’s home in Ventura County, CA, about 75 miles from my home in Los Angeles County. My sister is 56 and her boyfriend is 66. Also my daughter age 40 and my 2 grandson’s ages 15 and 12 were there. I am 70. We spent about 8 hours in proximation without wearing masks. My sister owns a single family home in a HOA. The HOA was having a 4th of July event with food and drinks in the community room. I saw only a few masks. Also the United States Navy was doing flyovers throughout Ventura County and homeowners were mingling in the streets. Again, I only saw a few masks. However, I am so grateful to be able to spend time with my grandson’s. That time is absolutely priceless. I want my grandson’s to know that I am here for them. Strong, ready, and able. I feel so guilty that I have not spent more time with my single mom daughter and my 2 grandson’s during the COVID-19 pandemic. It’s time that I can’t recapture. I have no idea what the future with COVID-19 beholds, but I personally plan on spending more time with my daughter and my grandson’s. Because no matter what is going on, we are absolutely not guaranteed tomorrow!

    by Bubbajog — July 5, 2020

  32. Glad you enjoyed your visit…but why no masks? Did you stay 6 ft apart? I know it must be hard staying away from family but we must take precautions. We have no family except on the east coast so it’s much easier staying away until we can see them again….

    by Mary11 — July 5, 2020

  33. So, I live in a state that had strict stay at home orders starting in March , mandatory masks, and mandatory 14 day quarantine for anyone entering the state. This did not stop the virus, it slowed it down to a controlled growth so that the hospitals were not overwhelmed. People have lost their jobs and made huge sacrifices to try to control this pandemic. I had to leave a job in a school that I loved. It is very hard for me not to feel infuriated when I see or hear that people elsewhere are not doing their part. My age and cancer history and medications put me at high risk. When I read posts about parties and no masks, it makes me feel that this pandemic will never end. The USA is now the laughing stock of the entire world because this virus is out of control here. I have friends in other countries asking me what the heck is going on. Is it hopeless?

    by Maimi — July 6, 2020

  34. My daughter’s new MIL who lives across the state rented a vacation home in a resort nearby for children and grandchildren to visit for this weekend. They begged my daughter/her husband to come and bring baby since no one has seen him since Christmas. Daughter wavered. I begged her not to go, cases are really rising here and they are shutting things down again. They convinced her everything was pristine and they would not mingle with strangers while there. I lost, they went. Saturday night MIL went to bed exhausted and Sunday came down with a fever. She went home to be tested. Everyone scattered back to their homes. Pediatrician can’t give baby a test unless he gets symptoms. They are isolating and on pins and needles until MIL’s test results come back. Let’s hope the test is accurate and negative. I could strangle her.

    Yes. Didn’t want to be party-pooper, naysayer, chicken little or jealous in-law since I didn’t have a crystal ball. Daughter is usually sensible but folded under peer pressure and wanting to please new husband and MIL. Hoping this turns out to be false alarm and lesson for her to put her own and baby’s wellbeing first from now on. I had to learn that lesson myself, took many years. Might encourage MIL to consider other people, too.

    Good news! Daughter’s MIL’s COVID test was negative! Bad news, no one learned a lesson. MIL said she knew she didn’t have it because she walked 2 miles yesterday and felt fine. Guess being a moron is a pre-existing chronic condition.

    by Daryl — July 6, 2020

  35. Thank you Maimi and Daryl…..I also just cant quite understand why people these days just cant stay away from family and friends while we’re trying to kill this virus. If we dont we will continue to hear about more deaths every day. I dont want to get into all of these Karen situations in stores either. I guess people cant handle being told what to do even if it’s for the safety and economy of our country. They need to start listening to the right people or at least care about what you might be spreading while you are enjoying yourself for a few hours of fun!!

    by Mary11 — July 6, 2020

  36. Daryl, I hope they are all ok. Some people are just so stupid. I hope your daughter learns a valuable lesson, that I never did. Her MIL is not in charge of her family and she can stand up to her and say no. You must be so angry at this woman! I would be beside myself if this were my daughter.

    by Maimi — July 6, 2020

  37. For those longing to see children/grandchildren, here is an idea from long ago. There is a children’s book called FLAT STANLEY (50 years old!) about a child who was accidentally flattened, and one of his adventures was being mailed. My niece’s teacher read them the book and they all made ‘flat’ cutouts of themselves, using crayons and construction paper. Then they mailed themselves to someone they wished they could visit, asking that the flat version of themselves do the same things they would do if they were there. My niece sent her flat self to me. I returned her, along with pictures of Flat Amanda feeding gulls at the ocean, singing in the choir loft next to her grandmother, playing board games at home, getting a big hug and kiss, watching someone blow a glass vase, and wearing a new T-shirt (too big for Flat Amanda but just right for the other Amanda) that read “Somebody in ______ loves me”. Send yourself, ask your grandkids to send themselves to you. Read the book together–paperback is $4.79 at Amazon. Not the same, but surprisingly touching.

    by Andrea — July 6, 2020

  38. Yes Daryl. It appears this is payback. We were told not to trust anyone over 30. I remember that so well. And as we well know KARMA is a bitch! With today’s technology, young people can do whatever they want with COVID-19. I just read some articles regarding Boomer-Remover. Much anger towards Boomers around the globe. Always lecturing the younger generations, but living lives of arrogance, consumption, lies, deceit, and destruction. The reality is that the younger generations are now in control, and they are not at all happy with Baby Boomers!

    COVID-19 can’t be stopped right now because college students and young adults really don’t give a damn if old people get COVID-19. I don’t know why that would be so hard to understand. Actually they might be intentionally spreading the virus. COVID-19 parties are now popping up across the country for young people. The purpose of the parties are to contract COVID-19. The first person to catch COVID-19 wins money. Some colleges will be opening soon. That means hell week and pledging begins. Watch out old people!!! Even with a vaccine, Fauci estimates half the population won’t take the vaccine. I believe what old people should be asking is: Why do young people despise us so much?

    by Bubbajog — July 6, 2020

  39. I live in Orange County, CA and as the stupidity of those around me increases, I have become ever more vigilant. I wear a mask even when I go out to walk my dogs. When I must go to the store or the gas station or the vet’s office – and those are the only places I go – I wear a mask, a face shield, and gloves. I obsessively disinfect the house because my sister lives with me and she goes to the local stables every day to help out with the horses and I’m not sure how careful she is about distancing and wearing a mask. I have given up meeting with friends in person but stay in touch through zoom, phone and text. I have reconciled myself to putting things on hold for probably a year, but I am better able to do that than many because I’m an introvert, love to read, and have lots of projects going on. Pickleball will still be around after this is over, and I can put my bike on the trainer and stay in shape that way.

    My neighbor across the street has a 4th of July party every year. I thought she would cancel it this year – she didn’t. I thought most people would avoid it (as I did) – they didn’t. Nor did they social-distance or wear masks. They also shared food. After the party was over, everyone remaining gathered in a close circle and talked for hours. They were outside, but the air was still and, well – there are no guarantees being outside will keep you from getting it. I’m not going to be surprised if someone on my street comes down with this virus. But I’m doing everything I can, even if I’m obsessive-compulsive about it, to make sure it isn’t me.

    by Joann C — July 6, 2020

  40. Yes, Bubbajog, I read that some refer to COVID-19 as the “Boomer-remover.” Did it start with our generation’s saying not to trust anyone over 30? I don’t think they understand the concept of “what goes around, comes around.” Karma might just bite them in the butt.

    Joann C, this is such an incredible social experiment unraveling. Are the revelers protected by their camaraderie and the endorphins produced? And we introverts huddled inside in fear, are we any safer or just downgrading our immune systems? Bubbajog, were we so harmful to the younger generations that they hate us? Or were they told by others that we are stealing their social security and ruined the environment when it was not us, but specific companies and power-mongers. We just worked and paid our taxes. Weren’t our parents just as neglectful, punitive, and unapologetic, yet we respected them? We might be guilty of infusing our youth with empty values, the almighty dollar above all else, but weren’t we forced into that position by our economy? Maybe too much emphasis was put on valuing individualism over the collective society and our responsibility towards each other. Doesn’t somebody study this stuff for a living?

    by Daryl — July 6, 2020

  41. Yes Daryl, I believe with clarity we can say generational conflict is a real part of our human existence. Also, with the incredible advancement in technology younger generations will hold a far superior advantage over older generations for both good and the real potential for bad and deadly outcomes.

    by Bubbajog — July 6, 2020

  42. My daughter & son-in-law are both health care professionals working in areas of the hospital with its own air systems, etc. because their patients are immune impaired. They still cut my babysitting to practically zero due to a fear of transmitting the virus. On the other hand, our family did get together two months ago for a few hours. No hugs etc, but we were in the same room for the 1st time since Xmas for a “special” event. The unmarried son has found insta-love with a young doctor he just met (we have an insane family history of getting engaged within a month or two of meeting our spouses. Knock wood — all of the marriages were filled with romance & lasted til’ death.) Next month they’re flying to see her parents in a city with high Covid rates, with the engagement to follow. I’m trying to tell myself their trip makes more sense than drinking at a bar without a mask, etc, but it’s NOT working. Stay home! Don’t travel! Wear masks & quarantine! Things can wait! As an analogy, more Americans have died from Covid in 7 mos. than Americans who were killed in WW1 (in the approx. 1-1/2 yr that the US was in the war). It’s patriotic to sacrifice personal desires, to support US efforts to defeat the virus and save lives.

    by Kate — July 7, 2020

  43. Daryl and Bubbajog, I really hate to admit it, but having come to the same conclusions independently, I must say that I agree with you completely. It’s clear that the younger generations don’t care and would just as soon see us elders die off. After all, it could well help Soc Sec last longer and likely provide for more jobs — someone has to do it. I think we as grandparents want to believe that our grandkids love us and want to protect our vulnerability. But, while individuals may vary, it sure doesn’t appear that way on the beaches, in the bars and at those Covid-parties!

    I’ve been hesitant to bring this sad concern up, but truly believe that all of us need to take the extra steps we can to protect ourselves. Unfortunately, the outlook on Covid-19 is not good. Right now we have the resurgence and the 4th is not even part of the picture yet. With schools opening at all levels and pressures from politicos to open more and faster right at the time we can well expect flu as well as the second wave of Covid, things look scary. It’s finally recognized that even outdoors, the slightest breeze can carry infectious particles 20 feet or more. Fauci has said that given the lack of cooperation with medical science experts, we are not likely to reach the level of “herd immunity.” Any single vaccine can only be a partial success (maybe 75% at best). There is growing evidence that any immunity following infection is only short-lived. And finally, it seems that even younger people ARE now beginning more and more to be affected. And we haven’t really touched on the possibilities of mutations.

    Folks, I don’t say this to be a downer. Keep on keeping on! Protect yourselves and stay as safe as you can. Try to convince your families and friends to do the same (and let them know we are worth keeping around). My true hope is that with all the vaccine development taking place, that some combination of successes will finally overcome this virus. Meanwhile, we need to be as safe as we can and continue to enjoy each day in the safest ways possible.

    by RichPB — July 7, 2020

  44. I am so curious to understand why a post regarding drug companies and the financial incentives to develop a COVID-19 vaccine would be censored. It baffles me.

    Hi Bubbajug. We love your posts but this one was off topic. The topic here was how your compliance and vigilance is changing over time. Your post is nice to know but not a good fit for the topic, and not particularly relevant to our retirement discussions. Thank you for the question about guidelines for posting, we should have reminded people more often about them. You can see them at https://www.topretirements.com/SiteRule.html
    Now I realize we need to update them to add a sentence about staying on topic and not trying to turn the Comments into back and forth conversations with other members. We have had complaints from people who say they would love to post (probably interesting stuff) but that they think we too often go off topic and back and forths, so they don’t bother. We will amend those Site Rules soon. Our goal is to have an open and interesting discussion about the topics raised in each Blog post. Plus, we are always looking for new topics to explore, you can use https://www.topretirements.com/Contactus.html to send us those. Thanks everybody!

    by Bubbajog — July 8, 2020

  45. We should be careful about painting generations with too broad a brush. The younger Americans who violate the COVID guidelines are bound to get the most press about it; the press likes controversy. Folks in their 20’s and 30’s don’t have the life experience of older generations, making them more likely to take risks, even with disease, witness STDs. COVID-spreading parties, assuming they exist, are mostly participated in by the tiniest percentages of a particular generation and don’t necessarily represent the thinking of an entire generation. It was mentioned here that someone should be working on a study of these matters. I’m sure people are. It will take some time to do statistical research and other reliable studies to determine how different generations were affected by and reacted to COVID. It’s too early to draw accurate conclusions, so what we do draw are broad generational conclusions that may or may not be proven to be correct with further scientific and sociological research.

    As to “censorship” of posts here, those in charge are operating a private entrepreneurial business. They have the right not to print certain comments they believe are inappropriate under the owners’ guidelines. A simple analogy is that newspapers, usually privately-owned, don’t have to print every letter-to-the-editor sent to them. Judging from the administrators’ occasional comments here, I trust them to make reasonable decisions about the appropriateness of comments under their policies. Comments deemed inappropriate for publishing are not necessarily “bad” or “wrong,” but simply not in keeping with the in-house guidelines the administrators have. (By the way, I have no connection or relationship whatsoever with the administrators of this website.)

    by Clyde — July 8, 2020

  46. Clyde, I agree with you as far as maturity bringing less risk-taking behavior, but I’m also seeing it break down strictly on personality type regardless of age. We’ve seen a lot of grizzled oldsters on TV and in my personal life being just as foolhardy. Hopefully the majority are taking this virus seriously and behavIng accordingly. It’s the lack of consideration for others that always bugs me, and there’s no age limit on that, it’s a personality trait. I feel the same way about generational resentment, it’s nature, and they will be in our shoes one day. Some are smart enough to realize that already.

    A lot of the population thinks many types of people are disposable. My grandma lived with us, a force to be reckoned with, and when I would whine and moan about my trials du jour, she always joked “it’s a great life if you don’t weaken!” Let’s just stay strong and healthy and disappoint them all.

    by Daryl — July 8, 2020

  47. Unfortunately, I really believe there is a good portion of the population that has the sentiment that old people are disposable, so let them die! We are very much a youth and beauty based society and culture. Those attributes are very prevalent in Southern California and South Florida. There is resentment and blame by the young towards the old regarding the draconian measures that have been taken to stop the spread of COVID-19. Dr. Fauci is talking to the young about their moral responsibility to society to stop spreading the COVID-19 virus. I have seen enough nursing home facilities. My mantra is if I weaken GAME OVER!

    by Bubbajog — July 8, 2020

  48. It appears that attitudes and behavior towards this virus depend on where one lives and political affiliation more than on medical advice.

    by Maimi — July 9, 2020

  49. Medical advice is not the ONLY consideration. If people cannot go to medical providers due to restrictions then what other curable ailments are put off until they become deadly? How many lives are destroyed due to financial ruin due to loss of employment caused by state mandated business closures and travel restrictions? There are also practical concerns such as enforcement of edicts from mayors/governors. Can/should millions of people be incarcerated/fined simultaneously for violating mask wearing? I see many people wearing masks incorrectly so the effectiveness is nil in those cases so should/fined they be arrested for improper mask-wearing or only the fully unmasked be punished? There are constitutional considerations such as what level of restrictions / over reach is being taken by lawmakers versus what is allowed in our founding documents? I am all for a private business mandating mask wearing (as my employer does to me) but I am not for the government mandating the wearing of masks unless it is inside a government facility. The mortality rate on this diseases is very low so that must be measured against the damage wrought by shutting everything down for many months on end.

    by Danno — July 10, 2020

  50. Hi from Houston, Texas current hot spot for Covid -19. How has life changed over time due to Covid-19? Well we cancelled our family vacation to Aruba. We have been self isolating since March 2; always wearing mask when out & about; limit trips to PO Box, grocery store (pick up lane), Doctor appointments, PT and fast food drive in’s. Church services are on you tube with Sunday school through email lessons. Our two grown sons and their families are in our bubble and they are also isolating and wearing mask. Both are working from home. Visit relatives by face time weekly and long distance friends by phone monthly. Try to limit watching the news but have become more politically active with different non-profits. Miss little league baseball with grandsons and football. Laughed out loud when I got excited about watching a golf match which we’ve never done before. I’ve started watching the cowboy channel and addicted to “Yellowstone”. Doing lots more reading, garden maintenance and organizing. Using Amazon a lot and coupons less. No longer go to gym or physically volunteer or take any physical classes for hobbies. I feel the virus has isolated and divided us more than anything. I have lecture myself every other day about maintaining protections by reminding myself how lucky we are to have the blessings we do (home, food, medical care) compared to so many others. And I remember how hard my parents had it during the depression but how they kept going and thrived just not survived.

    by Trish — July 10, 2020

  51. Thank you Miami and Danno! I have been reading all these depressive responses and they come from a different perspective than mine. I am a healthy 60+ year old, and the I believe the media and others are doing all they can to get their viewers to come to their perspective . My parents are still alive and they, too, are not taking quarantine well and no longer practice it. They want to see their family. Isolation is soooo bad for anyone. It can perpetuate the fear. I have FAITH that GOD will see us through and I refuse to live in fear.

    by Lindalu — July 10, 2020

  52. Here is what I am doing about compliance and vigilance about the coronavirus. I am doing everything I can to try to be safe, while at the same time enjoy life. Outdoor sports that I avoided in March and April, like tennis and golf, seem OK now, if I observe social distancing and wear a mask if I have to go inside or get close to someone. I go into stores, but wear a mask. No dining inside a restaurant. We will see another couple for a drink if we are all outside and have separate snacks. I feel it is my responsibility as a citizen of the world not to infect other people, so I wear a mask if I have to go inside with others. I realize that if I am careless and infect my wife or a friend, it will be on me. The mask isn’t for me, it is for you. 134,000 people killed so far, and hundreds more every day. That seems like serious stuff to me.

    So for those who choose the economy or personal liberty over safety and scientific knowledge, take responsibility for your decision. If you are unfortunate and do get sick with the virus, stay home. Find a comfortable place in your home and hope you get better. Don’t risk the health of our medical personal and EMTs because you weren’t cautious. And, if you infect a relative, friend, stranger, or person working in a store because you didn’t take precautions, realize that your decision had consequences for the person you put in danger. Knowing that you preserved your liberty probably won’t make them feel better.

    by Carl — July 10, 2020

  53. Trish-
    I’m in PA and have been and still am following the life restrictions you mention since March!! You better get used to it! It seems so negligent that the Covid disaster that played out in the northeast months ago was largely ignored by the rest of the country. I’m grateful that the governors here acted swiftly and strictly to control the growth of the virus. Things finally are beginning to reopen but not so much for me as my vigilance continues due to what I’ve seen in the sunbelt states. Hoping that our reopening goes better. I guess we’ll find out.

    by Staci — July 11, 2020

  54. People can still see their providers for other health problems. It’s just that some choose not to because of fear of the virus. I also believe that people should listen to the docs and epidemiologists, but of course many don’t and are also non-compliant with their own health issues. As a retired medical provider and microbiologist I have great respect for infectious disease and will always put the safety of individuals above politics. BTW, here in SC things have not been shut down for months on end and that is why the rate here is climbing daily. If we had strong leadership in the beginning we may have gotten a handle on this, now it’s anybody’s guess. I continue to wear a mask and social distance when I do go out which is maybe 1-2x/week. Magical thinking will not undo the virus, but continuing to take precautions until a vaccine is available seems to me the most realistic way to live.

    by Fionna — July 11, 2020

  55. You appear to be suggesting that it may be unconstitutional for governments to impose restrictions, fines, etc. for requiring people to wear masks or for shutting down businesses. I refer you to the 1905 Supreme Court decision in Jacobson v. Massachusetts, in which the Court held that the government has extraordinary powers when it comes to protecting the public health. So while you personally may not like to wear a mask or see shutdowns, please don’t question the constitutionality of these actions, because they are indeed constitutional. The Fifth Circuit Court of Appeals recently cited Jacobson to ban abortions during the pandemic, saying the when necessary for the public health, Constitutional rights could be restricted: “[U]nder the pressure of great dangers,” constitutional rights may be reasonably restricted “as the safety of the general public may demand. That settled rule allows the state to restrict, for example, one’s right to peaceably assemble, to publicly worship, to travel, and even to leave one’s home.” Most of us recognize that the economy will not get back on its feet until people feel safe. Most people understand that masks are the best way to slow and stop this pandemic. Most people will put up with the temporary discomfort of wearing a mask for the greater good. But when people don’t, the government has every right to step in and require it. And there is absolutely no question that such actions on the part of the government are constitutional.

    by Joann C — July 11, 2020

  56. I agree that people who put their own liberty over stopping the spread of this pandemic need be held responsible. I think it is criminal conduct and should be punished. It is reckless disregard for human life. There is no disputing the science and anyone who infects another by refusing to wear a mask and social distance, knew or should have known that they were likely to inflict bodily harm on another. There have been successful prosecutions of people who knowingly transmitted HIV to another by failing to take precautions or warn another. We now know enough about COVID that there is no disputing that it is deadly, highly contagious, and preventable with the right precautions.

    by Maimi — July 11, 2020

  57. Carl, and Maimi, well articulated, and we’re on the same page with you. This is all about us, and we, not about me, and includes chucking those desperate conspiracy theories.

    by DLJ — July 11, 2020

  58. Joann C, thank you for your concise and well-informed post about the constitutional right of governments to mandate action necessary to protect the health and safety of the public at large. During the HIV-AIDS crisis, governments appropriately required, among other measures, bath houses to close. However, most people didn’t think there was anything wrong with that, primarily because it affected “somebody else.” Now that we have a pandemic triggered by a virus that is arguably more transmissible than any other flu-like virus that has caused pandemics in the U.S., the health measures put in place by knowledgeable government authorities do not affect “somebody else,” but every single one of us. Even if one lives in the smallest town in the least-affected state, there’s no escaping the fact that there IS a possibility of contracting the virus, even there. That’s why Americans who care about themselves and others should be following government orders or guidelines.

    Covid-19 is a reality of nature. It has no mind, no intentionality, no reason to exist – except that it does exist. Until there is a vaccine or highly-effective treatment, humans are subject to the virus and what it can do. The only things we humans really can do are to mitigate Covid-19 (masks, social distancing, shutdowns, etc.) and intensively and rapidly work towards medical advances to halt and significantly ameliorate the disease. My opinion, based only on observation and my own study and research, is that this pandemic and its effects are likely to get worse and we will be dealing with it for months, at the least. This, of course, is not what I want at all, but our human desires have no effect on the virus itself. The pandemic is certainly a major test of how we can react and learn from it. This won’t be easy, but I have complete faith that we will get through this. Although it will leave us scarred, there surely will be some beneficial things to come out of it.

    Discussing Covid-19 is certainly topical in terms of retirement living. It’s going to affect us during some of the most meaningful times of our finite lives. I hope we’ll do the best we can to deal with and get through it to a happier future.

    by Clyde — July 11, 2020

  59. We moved two comments here from another Blog:
    From RichPB:
    All you have to do is read some of Covid-19 reckless responses here on TR and watch the news once a day to see that the irresponsible all over the country continue to put us all at risk despite our attempts at protection. We will not travel even to neighboring cities.

    The NC governor has done most of the right things fortunately, but irresponsible people and legislators have fought him all the way. Despite incorrect news broadcasts, NC is still one of the safer states.
    PA tried but is in the news for a resurgence in Bucks County. Wear masks! Stay home and wash hands and use good disinfectants.

    Many experts (yes, I listen to them) predict we are just getting started — with irresponsible behavior, this pandemic may last 10 years in the US. We would become the pariahs of the world. We are almost there now.

    From Jean:
    I dont watch the news,too much hysteria and cherry-picking of doom and gloom. Yes, there are increases in cases in SC, Fl, Tx, etc., also an increase in testing but most importantly, for the number of positive tests the number of very serious cases is way, way lower than in NYC. . This virus will continue to circulate probably forever just as colds do …. For those unfortunates who have terrible outcomes, most had risk factors like obesity, diabetes, uncontrolled hypertension, etc.
    So we go along with the program and wear masks as required but will also live as we choose.

    Editors Comment: Some of this post was edited to delete some suspect statements and facts. With over 130,000 people dead and new case records being broken every day, we feel it is not responsible to publish comments that diminish the threat that this virus poses for the U.S. and the world.

    by Admin — July 12, 2020

  60. Not too much has changed for me since March 15th stay at home/shutdown. I switched 90% of my computer assistance work to remote access from home. I’m a recent Valley Fever victim and 65 so considered higher risk.

    I did start venturing out to do some grocery shopping, with mask, social distance and only where I felt safe. Due to the current situation in Arizona, I’m back to Safeway delivery service, Walgreens drive through, Amazon and other online shopping. I’ve not been to any dine in restaurant, I do pickup only. I golf once a week (provides socializing with distance), go to the pool (distanced but interact with people), and started walking 3-4 miles every other day, fitness classes on zoom. In some ways my life is better but the big hole is the socializing. Cancelled trips this year and don’t see any travel plans in the immediate future.

    I’m blessed to live the life I do and can take advantage of the benefits my community living provides. I’m not blind to the struggles of so many due to the financial/economic aspects of this pandemic.

    My big thing right now is to stay healthy and out of the ERs for any reason. We are at a critical stage here where patients are being shipped out to other cities or states with resources so stretched. We must turn this around in Arizona, the governor reopened without meeting any of the guidelines laid out by CDC and task force. I believe that we have witnessed mismanagement of a National Emergency at all levels of government.

    Thankfully there are now some therapeutics that are improving outcomes but I already know some who have died and some who have significant health issues after “recovery”. Such a difficult time trying to balance personal safety with economics. Be well, be kind, there is a lot of stress out there.

    by ljtucson — July 12, 2020

  61. Editors, long time reader and rarely comment. Know you legitimately battle the appropriateness of posts, but that you deliberately chose to include Jean’s above is disappointing. The statement, “although I suspect that as soon as the General Election in Nov is over it will mysteriously drop from the radar and not be given my more attention”, is the most, but not the only controversial remark that crosses the line.

    With countries world wide fighting a global pandemic, some faring far better than others, depending on their tactics, is it all a conspiracy to control populations like sheep and dominate the world? Or maybe like the president has said numerous times that the virus would just disappear?

    It is nothing more than magical thinking, and as they say, hope is not a strategy.

    I’m not averse to allowing debate that ventures into the political arena, but the evolution of your history here is bewildering. I’d expect you to delete my post as well. Otherwise, I appreciate all the work you do!

    Editor’s Comment: Thanks DLJ for the thoughts here. We should have been more careful about the post you describe. We feel an obligation to avoid being a source that diminishes the threat of coronavirus, which we are being overwhelmed by. So, reluctantly, we deleted parts of that post.
    Just a reminder to all, this post was not meant to discuss whether coronavirus is a threat or not, it was to talk about how you are handling your exposure and how that is evolving over time.

    by DLJ — July 12, 2020

  62. After several months into the Covid-19 pandemic, we continue to do about the same as when orders and guidelines were announced. Being retired gives us a bit more choice. We’ve been having our groceries delivered, although we may soon go to contactless pickup. Whenever we’re away from our house/property, we wear masks except in the car and when properly distanced, which I consider about 10 feet to be on the safer side. Connecticut doesn’t allow any indoor dining, but I wouldn’t do that even if allowed. We probably won’t be doing any outdoor restaurant dining (though now allowed with masks/distancing) for the foreseeable future. We’ve picked up a few meals at restaurants. I have been in a grocery store only once and in a couple of other stores (pharmacies, hardware) for necessities. Otherwise, it’s stay at home.

    We have had one travel issue to deal with. My spouse must fly to be with his ailing 90-year mother for a while. He’ll wear clothing covering all his body except his head, which will be masked, possibly with an additional face shield. By doing a lot of reading on the subject, we’ve determined what looks like the safest seat on the plane and he’ll take that one. The airline, Southwest, is still blocking middle seats on their flights, which is helpful. Upon arrival, he’ll spray all his luggage with Lysol as soon as it comes off the carousel. His sister will bring him to his mother’s, where he’ll shower and wash his traveling clothes. It seems like a lot of detail, but it’s what we can think of due to the necessity of his flying. We wouldn’t otherwise fly except for a significant necessity, although I think flying may be safer than some information that has been circulating.

    Even taking all the precautions we know of, it’s still a long slog through a difficult time. Our lives have been so disrupted in terms of our previous mobility and human contact. We will make it through this, but will often have to delay gratification until it’s safe to seek it. Otherwise, this major period of adjustment will last much longer than necessary due to humans’ failing to practice necessary mitigation.

    by Clyde — July 12, 2020

  63. The situation keeps changing from week to week. One of my kids in healthcare has now been rotated into Covid care (in a red zone). The numbers of cases here keeps increasing. Staffing in my kids’ hospital system is down as an increasing number of nurses/doctors and other professionals are testing positive and being quarantined. Not only are the remaining staff being required to take on higher numbers of patients, but patients in the non-Covid, essential wards like cardiac, cancer and maternity might now be receiving care from someone who was rotated through Covid-care the day before. There are still shortages of N95 masks, despite being one of the top hospitals in the country per US News & World ratings. I’m still self-quarantining as much as possible and wear a mask to get groceries every 2-3 weeks. And yet…despite mask orders, curfews, social-distancing and other orders from our state, there are still people who refuse to wear a mask and think it’s not a big deal. I guess they have to land in ICU or have someone in their family seriously ill before they see what’s in front of them. Thank goodness we can see vaccines on the horizon.

    by Kate — July 31, 2020

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